I wrote my first story back in elementary school. It’s a sci-fi story with aliens, the future, and a melding of what I had seen in Blade Runner and Doctor Who. I even drew cool little pictures of the aliens in the stories. From an early age, I knew that I wanted to be a writer. I found writing to be therapeutic and cathartic. Through my imagination, not only could I escape, but most importantly, I could deal with my feelings by playing scenes out among all the characters I created.

I wrote more stories, then wrote a novel at 16 and kept going.

I got my B.A. in English Literature and French and then my Masters in English Literature.

I kept trying (and failing) to get my first novel published. I rewrote it, wrote other stories, but I eventually gave up.

Teacher after teacher kept telling me to find a day job because writing fiction didn’t pay the bills. They were right, but only to a point.

I failed to achieve my dream of becoming a “famous” author. And when I hit rock bottom, I stopped writing fiction. I would blog or write non-fiction articles, but I gave up writing novels. I tried writing a sequel to my first book back in 1999, but the first draft still hasn’t seen the light of day. I listened to what others said about writing and not being able to make a move and let failure win.

When we fail, it’s like life is teaching us a lesson. The failure is giving us much-needed information on how to adapt, change, write differently, but failure doesn’t mean we suck or that we’ll never succeed.

After my daughter came into the world, I had an idea to write a brand new series based on Cinderella. The premise was pretty simple: What happened after Cinderella married the prince? What if things weren’t all happy ever after. Now ten years later, I have published 11 novels.

But I still haven’t found a way to make a living off of my writing, but that doesn’t mean that I have given up.

I have taken my failures and learned from them. I have become a better writer than I was ten years ago. If we allow failure to define us, to beat us down, and never to try, then we’re allowing ourselves to be victims.

And I don’t like that.

I’m a survivor.

I work hard and write because it’s what I love to do.

Can my books be better? Yes.

But the only way I know how to become better is to read, listen to what other authors do and to learn from them and writing. I decided a long time ago that I would rather fail and see my failures than never to have tried.

At least from the ashes of failure, I can rise and build something newer and better. To be beaten down and trapped by failure is a prison to me.

What have you failed at? Marriage? A job? A childhood dream? Maybe you may not be able to become a super famous singer, but that doesn’t mean you can’t sing. Perhaps you can teach music or write books about music or sing in a choir, and though you might not believe it, maybe you can achieve that dream you had. The thing is—if you don’t try and let failure define you, you’ll never know.

So what are you waiting for?

Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.