Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Wise words from a wise woman. Yet often, we allow ourselves to be beaten down and fall into the trap of believing what other people say about us.

Let’s stop that.

If we’re tired and feeling down, we need to take care of our most basic needs: food, drink and rest. But we also need to focus on love.

I wasted a lot of my life looking for validation and love from people who were either never going to give it to me or were unable.

All along, I needed to focus on my self-esteem and well-being.

As a kid, I had classmates that picked on me and I allowed them to get to me. But I eventually wised up and ignored them.

In high school, the kid behind me tried to get under my skin, but I wouldn’t let him see me get upset. When I didn’t react to his antics, he reached out and grabbed my dress shirt, and started to twist my nipple. I look back now and see how wrong this was. I was in homeroom in my Catholic high school, and this kid wanted to make me cry out in pain, so he grabbed my shirt, and my skin underneath, and twisted.

I didn’t fight him off. I didn’t call for a teacher. I just stood there.

You never know how you’re going to act in a moment when you’re being bullied, and I just stood like a stone statue. Eventually, he gave up and went to bother someone else. I made it through but did have a bruise that night.

He tried as hard as he could to make me feel weak and inferior, but I refused to give in.

I’ve had bosses yell at me and try to belittle me in front of a roomful of people. But I refused to give in.

Have you been in a situation in which someone tried to make you feel inferior?

I bet you have.

How does that make you feel?

And what did you do about it?

It’s not easy to stand up to the bully or to remain strong inside.

The secret to having resilience is practicing your self-esteem muscles.

Self-affirmations, journaling, and a healthy regimen of self-care are essential.

Each of us has different tools to focus on our self-esteem. No matter how young or old you are, it’s always a good time to build your self-esteem.

Pick three ways to weave them into your day and then make them a habit.

I have added daily meditation and affirmations to my self-esteem exercise plan, followed by a healthy dose of being easy on myself. If I make a mistake, it’s not the end of the world. I accept responsibility for my mistake and work to do better, but I have learned to shake the mistake off.

What three self-esteem builders can you add to your daily habits?

Write them down and hang them up where you can see them.

What do you have to lose?

Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.