The paradox of our lives is that we both are the same person but grow along the way. Not sure what I mean? Take a look at a picture of yourself from when you were a kid and look at yourself now. You might see hints of what you looked like then in your present look, but maybe not.

You’re still the same “you” but you’ve transformed in someone more mature.

The same is true with our personalities, skills, and experience.

We layer various parts of ourselves over the original “us” and grow over time.

If you start learning how to speak French today, you might be really bad at it. But five years from now, you could be fluent. The possibilities are endless—if we allow ourselves to be positive.

That’s the challenging part.

The inner chatter of negativity can pull us down, and our inner demons can cause us to go off course on our journey of self-discovery.

Years of negativity and experience self-destructive behavior from living in an alcoholic/dysfunctional family can seem difficult to overcome. The big “secret” really isn’t any secret at all.

We can overcome and transform through practice.

When you go about your day, if inner chatter is pulling you down, you will need to counter that.

Let’s say that you want to start a small business. You have an idea and want to give it a go.

You might not know where to start, how to raise the money or achieve your goal.

And, if you let it, negative thoughts can sink your dream before you even try.

“I’m not good enough.” “I’m too scared.” “I can’t take a risk right now.” “Next year will be better since I’m too busy right now.”

The negative chatter in your head can stop you from achieving your goals and transforming into the person you want to be.

To counter that, I recommend embracing your fears. Take the negative thoughts, accept them, love yourself, and move on.

“I am worthy and good enough.” “I’m frightened and that’s normal. I’m going to still try, anyway.” “I can’t foresee what next year will bring. I am going to start now and I will succeed.”

The practice of changing the inner dialogue within your thoughts takes time but will transform your life.

As corny as saying “I love myself” might sound, say it, write it, and believe it. The neglect and abuse (emotional, physical, or psychological) that you experienced in growing up in an alcoholic/dysfunctional family does not simply go away. To transform and embrace your best self, each day (throughout the day) you will need to challenge negative thoughts.

If you’re familiar with Alcoholics Anonymous, this is why the organization focuses on one day at a time. Or even one second at a time. Bit by bit, you will overcome the negativity that pulls you down, but it takes practice.

Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.