If you grew up in an alcoholic/dysfunctional family, then I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re holding onto some family secrets. Maybe one of your parents drank and no one ever told you to remain quiet, but you learned to be embarrassed and ashamed of your family upbringing.
But drinking or substance abuse may not have been the only secrets you kept quiet about. Maybe there was domestic violence or sexual abuse.
The secrets that you carry may be heavy and dark.
If you haven’t already, I urge you to speak to a therapist and work through the secrets that you carry.
Most of my life, I kept quiet about how I grew up and what happened in my family. As a kid, I looked around and saw happy families and wondered why my family wasn’t like that.
Remember: Whatever your parents or family members did and the secrets that you carry does not mean that you are implicit in any of that. If your father drank, that was his problem and not yours.
Unfortunately, in an alcoholic family, addiction affects everyone in the family. You might be carrying guilt over what happened to you, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you feel shame as well.
Separating yourself from the problems of your parents is critical to your own well-being.
We do not need to keep quiet and hold family secrets. I want to be clear here. I’m not saying to go out and gossip to get revenge on the people who harmed you. That’s not what I’m saying at all.
But to find healing and calm in your life, you might wish to tell your story.
I remember being a kid and being so afraid of what was happening around me. The drinking, drugs, and abuse kept me in a constant state of fear. When I look back, I realize that it was my imagination and yearning to write stories that helped save me. The fantastic worlds I dreamed up became an outlet for me to find some solace.
But now I am an adult and I can choose to speak out and share my stories with you so that I can help others.
Are you still keeping family secrets about drinking or abuse?
If so, what are you going to do about it? I don’t know what will work best for you, but my speaking to a therapist helped me immensely.
Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.
