Day 277: It's Not Your Fault

It’s not your fault. What isn’t your fault? It’s not your fault that a parent drank too much, or that hit you, or abused. It’s not your fault that they did drugs or lied or cheated or a whole host of things.

I’m not quite sure why we take on the mantle of responsibility and think that we are at fault. Maybe we were told that it was our fault, and that stayed with us all through the years.

A message of cruelty that wove its way into our heart, took hold, and then we looked to the darkness as truth.

When people are hurting, they lash out. This does not condone their behavior or forgive it, but it might help us better understand.

When a wounded animal is corned, it will attack. At our most primal level, we are animals. We are homo sapiens. To rise up and cast off the shame, fear, and blame is not easy to do.

We need to unlearn the messages and coded behaviors that helped form our personalities.

But it’s not impossible.

It’s not your fault.

As you go about your day, you can define what you are responsible for and what you aren’t. Setting those boundaries between you and another can get murky at times.

It’s not your fault.

And the message that I want to share with you today is: You cannot save them.

You couldn’t save them back then, and you can’t save them today.

The only person you are responsible for is you.

You can save yourself.

That’s where each of us needs to focus our energy.


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