There are some decisions that you will need to make that will be difficult. If you are on the road to self-healing from the trauma you suffered in growing up in an alcoholic or dysfunctional household, you will need to decide whether you wish to distance yourself from those who have caused you pain.
And that might include your parents.
Over the years, I’ve seen made people dealing with such hard choices.
If one or both of your parents are actively drinking, you might choose to cut your ties with them.
Dysfunctional behavior and family dynamics intertwined with alcoholism is a recipe for disaster.
The pain and hurt are tied into a gnawing feeling inside: You may never receive the type of love and support from your family that you have always wanted.
If your parents are still drinking and you’ve chosen to get help and go on a path of self-discovery, there will be conflicts between you.
Some decide to cut all contact with their family members who drink. Others try to open the doors back open for communication, are hurt, and then need to withdraw again.
I wish I could tell you that the path will be clear, but I can’t do that.
Each person will need to make their own decision on what is healthy for them.
Setting boundaries with parents who still drink and exhibit dysfunctional behaviors is going to be hard.
The question that I recommend you consider is this:
What is healthy for you?
If you are married and have your own family, what is healthy for your kids?
The answers to these questions will help you decide where you want to go in life and how you want to move forward on healing.
Getting sucked into the same dysfunctional dynamics, arguments, and yelling matches with family members is not going to help you.
The path forward might mean cutting off all ties to certain family members.
For today, instead of focusing on the future, take time to take care of yourself. Before you make a decision on what you want to do, talk with a trusted friend and a professional therapist.
The decision that you make will not be easy, but it’s one that you can’t avoid.
You will need to think through what you want out of life, and the first step is to figure out what makes you happy and what will help heal you.
Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.