Day 72: If not today, then when?

If not today, then when will you start?

To climb the mountain, get the new job, look for love, get divorced, leave your current job, write that book or live the life you always dreamed.

When?

Tomorrow or the day after that or maybe next year?

We do not know how long we have here. We just don’t.

I am scared shitless these days. I have major choices to make, and I’m afraid that I’ll make the wrong decision. I’m afraid that I might fail. I’m afraid that I’ll disappoint those who count on me.

And yet, I need to try.

There is that moment between making a decision and not. It’s a safe space in that you can think about taking the first step without doing it and gives you a buffer of time of feeling good about thinking about making a decision.

Thinking about taking action and doing it are entirely two different things.

It’s comfortable to think about the idea but never start. The fear of failure or rejection can overwhelm.

You are not alone.

I decided to start this blog because I wanted to challenge myself each day. The mechanics of the task are challenging: I need to come up with a topic, write about it in a short amount of time, and do all the nitty-gritty work on the back end to make my writing go live to the world.

I am now 72 days in. It doesn’t matter if someone reads my posts or not. Yes, I’d like more people to read my work. But I committed myself to try and to put my feelings out there.

I wanted to write about my fears, anxiety, and my weaknesses—to lay them bare for all to see (and hopefully identify with).

If I don’t take action today, why not?

Why is the fear so great that it would stop me from doing what I always longed and dreamed of doing? Is the fear and pain of rejection so great that it can paralyze me and make me feel small?

I have known failure. I have been ridiculed. I have not gotten the job. I have lost love.

But each time, I choose to get up and try again. Try a new way, a different way, a way to achieve my dreams.

The critical voice inside my head says that I’m delusional. I’m not special. I’m just going to fail like everyone else, and then I’ll regret putting my neck out and trying.

Have you ever felt this way?

What is stopping you from embracing your greatest dream? Money? Time? Ability?

I talk a big game about trying and taking steps to achieve my life’s goal.

I believe that, no matter how difficult our childhood, we can use imaginative stories to heal ourselves and lead lives filled with love and hope. I believe it’s my goal to share stories with people all around the world and to listen.

What do you want to do?

If you’re standing in the spot between listening to your fear and taking the first step, what will change you inside to take action?

One day we will look back on our lives and have those few seconds of all that we have done and all we will leave behind. What is it within your heart that would hurt so much that you could not live with that burden on you?

Whatever that is, then today’s the day.

Take a leap of faith and try.

Bridges to the future are not built in a day. They are created piece by piece. To start a journey means exactly that: To begin. It might take years of hard work to achieve our dreams, but if we don’t start today, then when?

Today is the day.

Today is your day.


Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.