No matter how hard you push, you can’t be perfect. Chasing after perfection is a fool’s errand. It’s also setting you up for failure if you think that you must be perfect.
The pain and suffering that you grew up with as kids in an alcoholic or dysfunctional family hangs over us and is part of who we are. I know that there have been times where I’ve overcompensated and tried to do everything for everyone. That path leads to burnout and exhaustion.
What I’ve learned over the years is that I’ve looked at life from a different perspective. I’ve tried really hard to solve problems outside my own, or I’ve thought that I can’t make a difference. That I wasn’t good enough.
Neither of those things are true, but when I doubt myself and don’t take care of myself, then I’ve had problems with losing myself.
I’ve recently read The Art of Possibility by Rosamund Stone Zander and Benjamin Zander. In the book, they discuss “the habit of thinking you make no difference.” Instead of thinking that we need to be perfect or to try to save others, what would happen if we gave ourselves an A and acted that way. What does that mean?
Instead of overcompensating by working too hard or trying to be perfect, what if we were comfortable with who we were and each day did the best we could?
What is lost because we often forget to see it, is that the work we do each day compounds over the days, weeks, months, and years?
Marketing guru Seth Godin recently told a story on Cathy Heller’s “Don’t Keep Your Day Job” podcast about a woman who sold coffee at a local store. People from all around the city came to buy coffee from her. Why? Because she greeted each person with a smile, remembered people’s names, and treated them with respect. She made a contribution to each individual, and she worked hard to be true to herself.
We don’t need to be perfect. We only need to be ourselves. And yes, sometimes that’s messy.
But the work that we have to do is to focus on making a contribution each day.
Some days that contribution needs to be for you. When children, your coworkers, and loved ones see you taking time for yourself, your actions speak more than words.
I’m not perfect. I can’t be on all the time. And neither are you.
That’s a good thing.
Let’s take time to embrace that.
Like what you’ve read? Be sure to check out my other posts in my Let Go and Be Free blog.